“To use cognitive incision, you must listen closely to the speaker”
Genuinely listening is what, in my view, is key in these situations, as it opens up the dialogue. Not listening to retort or react, but listening to also understand the undercurrent of energy and emotions that comes with the spoken word.
Genuinely listening gives the signal that you are really present in the conversation. Being fully present in combination with cognitive incision can be powerful enough to lower the defenses of the one who is conducting the monologue. And we have a greater prospect of finding ourselves in a balanced conversation.
In my article “Consciously Holding Space in Dialogue”, I delve into these dialogue dynamics in greater depth.